For me it’s like, you have a lot of stuff to do but you could play sudoku first. 3 sudoku games later, Ok let’s get started. I should get a drink first. Let me play another game of sadoku to resettle my mind. Ok let’s get started. Ok reading my email, let’s craft a response. Wife comes in and asks me to watch the kid for a min. Ok back to work, but let me check on my idle game real quick. 45 mins later.ok let’s get started, on that email response I have 5 mins before a meeting I scheduled perfect. 10 mins later, sorry I’m late got caught up on something. Let’s look into this random issue someone is having they brought up in the last meeting I have 20 mins before my next meeting perfect. 35 mins later I join meeting. 2 hours left in the day let’s work on what I needed to do. Normal time off comes up wife starts asking me when I’ll be done every 10 mins for the next hour.
“Why can’t my brain just stfu I’m trying to sleep?! Why did you decide to calculate the speed of the sun right now you mf? I want to sleep”
Either that or
“I know you want to do this thing but we need to do the other, come on or I’ll drag you ass over here”
Brain like: shutsdown fu now you can’t do neither, that’s what you get for not letting me decide
Or, y’know, both
Wait…. I had a point
I get really frustrated trying to do math, “in my head”. I didn’t realize for a long time that the way I was trying to do it isn’t what everyone does. I can only do math on paper, so I am literally drawing on imaginary paper in the air while desperately trying to keep track of things to only have it slip away like sand and then starting over. I still do subtraction/addition like I was taught in elementary where you cross out the number and write the remainder or whatever above it.
Trying to do that on imaginary paper and keep track of the slashes and tiny numbers is torture. Especially when the damn paper keeps moving, colors fading out, and I can’t just make the number appear. No. I have to mentally draw the strokes of each digit like I am using a pencil. Oh, and my handwriting sucks, so I write numbers really slow. Have I randomly mentioned I fucking hate white boards? Now I have. I have nothing to leverage my hand or arm on.
Basically, trying to keep all of the noise out my head or at least on a similar task is really hard at times. It is like being in a crowded restaurant and each sound gets the same amount of attention. Every step, clink, swish, creak, conversation, air movement, cars outside, all gets an equal amount of attention. Imagine a flat equalizer in a sense.Your brain is supposed to be able to filter that shit out so you can talk to the person in front of you. We don’t get that luxury. Medication is a damn miracle. It isn’t perfect, but having even a fraction of peace in my head is enough.
Basically, trying to keep all of the noise out my head or at least on a similar task is really hard at times. It is like being in a crowded restaurant and each sound gets the same amount of attention. Every step, clink, swish, creak, conversation, air movement, cars outside, all gets an equal amount of attention. Imagine a flat equalizer in a sense.Your brain is supposed to be able to filter that shit out so you can talk to the person in front of you. We don’t get that luxury.
This hits so close. I like this analogy.
It’s frustrating trying to tell people that you really were paying attention, it’s just to everything, everywhere, all at once.
When I was formally tested, I gave a similar analogy to the psychiatrist/ADHD specialist. He immediately told me he was stealing it as it was a really great way to explain it to others. It really does kind of explain the whole executive dysfunction part to others.
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“Both. Both is good.”
I will admit, though… whenever I’m in a different place because of travel I photograph local stray cats and I’m excellent at spotting them… part of that might be my ADHD.
Pay the cat tax! I
wantneed your cat photos! 😻I sadly have concerns that because they are so specifically from my travels that they’d be too potentially useful for doxing - but if enough time passes that they aren’t a recent travelog I may!
No sweat, I totally understand ❤️
My wife is like that with mushrooms. She can spot a cool mushroom from a mile away haha
I laughed way harder at seeing the square root of 5 equals 5 than I did relating to the joke. Even my humor has ADHD.
2 good + 4 you ------- see ya l8er
