This is the kind of magazine page that 90s-kid-me would stare at for hours fantasizing over. Even looking at it now, it’s surprisingly easy for me to ignore the objective technical limitations and get hyped.
Side note: can we talk about that 1ST PC GUN on the mid-left there? Dude…
I assume the opossum was busy giving a press conference somewhere on behalf of the group.
“Can you believe this guy? He tells a joke at a funeral.”
“Doc, are you trying to tell me that you built a time machine…out of a DeLorean?!?”
“Marty, I’m going to be honest with you. I don’t think I have my meds properly balanced yet.”
“Heavy.”
“Precisely.”
“I am inventing electricity…and you look like an ASSHOLE.”
I’ll always fondly love the simple poetry of the Courier’s introductory scene, especially in the context of the two games it’s sandwiched between.
Fallout 3’s tutorial takes the protagonist through an underground infancy, childhood, and young adulthood before opening the vault door to the game’s world.
Fallout 4 sees the Player through the apocalypse itself before waking up in a tube and beginning the actual gameplay.
But New Vegas? Just a poor soul dragged from a literal shallow grave and patched up just enough to not die.
Halfway through this, I honestly thought the punchline was gunna be more like…
They’ll remember:
Nothing
The sun will eventually burn out
All human achievement will dissolve away with the eventual death of the physical universe
Wait. Am I okay? Jesus, dude…
I instinctively read that in Homestar Runner’s voice.
For the people who are still alive!
Ah, yes. The Spike Spiegel wing.
Edit: Where are my manners? Let’s throw Vash the Stampede in there too. Not enough love for Trigun these days.
Onward, men! Full sails to the horizon! On my oath, we’ll make it to Ikeland by morning!
Oh, there will be Ikes as far as the eye can see, I tell you! Tall Ikes, short Ikes, God-fearing Ikes! Our coffers will overflow with the abundance of Ikes!
You who would doubt me, who would claim the impossibility of such a paradise, you cowards who hide from ambition and surround yourselves with the petty offerings of Steve Island or David Cove, why you would not know how to handle the Ikes of Ikeland!
But I am a man of greater mettle, and I will know this new land.
Raise the anchor. The Ikes await.
This may be the saddest a comment has ever made me.
Patton Oswalt has a great bit on exactly this.
Captain Jack is a fartface–barrrrffff…
I know this is just a silly meme, but it makes me feel a little hopeful seeing evidence of other people thinking like this on the road, y’know, responding with empathy and concern for strangers instead of immediate vengeful anger.
My first thought. Definite Poolrooms energy.