The song What might be the song for the meme, Particle Man, in case anyone was interested… courtesy of the Animaniacs and They Might Be Giants.

Used an Excel spreadsheet? You’re now a data analyst. Dabbled in Access? Congratulations, you’re now an experienced database administrator.

I feel personally attacked and simultaneously validated by your analysis.

If you didn’t care, you wouldn’t have posted this comic.

Don’t fuck with the professional skeptics, kid. There is no limit to raw existential skepticism. All of your intentions are suspect…

Or are they? And what is suspected?

And am I talking to you or the audience? Why would I be talking to you when I don’t even know if you’re a real person or a bot? Is the audience listening? Am I listening? Am I real person? I think, therefore I am, but what happens when I’m not thinking?

Haven’t done it myself yet, but here’s the docker install guide… seeing what your username is and all…

Soundtrack

Lotta smarter people than me have already posted better answers in this thread, but this really stood out to me:

the thing is. my queries are not that complex. they simply go through the whole table to identify any duplicates which are not further processed then, because the processing takes time (which we thought would be the bottleneck). but the time savings to not process duplicates seems now probably less than that it takes to compare batches with the SQL table

Why aren’t you de-duping the table before processing? What’s inserting these duplicates and why are they necessary to the table? If they serve no purpose, find out what’s generating them and stop it, or write a pre-load script to clean it up before your core processing queries access that table. I’d start here - it sounds like what’s really happening is that you’ve got a garbage query dumping dupes into your table and bloating your db.

I play mages, so the real issue for me is that the magic system in Oblivion is far superior. Being able to craft your own spells is absolutely fantastic. Skyrim cheaped out by removing the complexity and spell crafting, and Shouts didn’t really serve as a decent replacement.

Combat with the remaster is exceptionally smooth and natural, and I honestly preferred the original Oblivion system than Skyrim’s - which always felt janky to me - like it was trying to use Fallout mechanics to show off, not because it made for a better combat experience.

The questing and storyline strikes an excellent balance between open world discovery and directed play - Skyrim’s felt disconnected, and I often lost track of exactly what was going on or why. You also get far more background and story - books in Skyrim are usually one or two pages long. Books in Oblivion usually are around 20 - 30 pages.

The remaster absolutely kicks ass - visually, it’s easily on par with Skyrim graphics, and the audio is fantastic. The performance is far better as well, but it still retains a lot of the old school flavor with the simple interface. I’m really enjoying it thus far - it’s been long enough since i played the original on the 360 that it’s like a new game.

Plus, it’s got some amazing early 00’s voice talent - Patrick Stewart plays the Emperor, and despite the lines being a bit janky at time due to how they were recorded, the actors did a really good job.

All in all, it’s AAA title from a time when that meant something, and with the modern engine and graphics, it’s a masterpiece that outshines many of the top titles out today.

Better than Skyrim. Fight me.

Authentinception

Nah, just say the plague will ravage the land, war will last for another seventy years, and you’re the only hope of salvation - that pretty much sums up the late 1300s. Then just get your followers off the battle lines, adopt a bunch of cats to keep the rat problem at bay, and practice basic sanitation and isolation - what we learned during COVID.

Within a couple of years, yours will be the only thriving community. Play your cards right, stay peaceful, prosperous, and show deference to the church and you’ll be pretty much set. Might even wrangle a sainthood if you play your cards right.

/s to all this of course… most likely I’d just use my extensive knowledge of porn and poetry to try and charm a noblewoman to take care of me.

Prophecy some major upcoming events, subsequently market myself as a saint, grab a comfy church position, sell indulgences, profit. Works in pretty much any era.

I prefer classic new teams

i⁷t¹²

Notepad++ - always been free, clean, and drastically better than Notepad:

Notepad++ is a free (as in “free speech” and also as in “free beer”) source code editor and Notepad replacement that supports several languages. Running in the MS Windows environment, its use is governed by GNU General Public License.

Guys…

If you’re looking to get to California, have your husband check out PG&E - they’re almost always actively hiring linemen at that rate - usually higher. You can make it here on $100k relatively comfortably if you’re smart with your $.

There’s still racism here, but it’s nowhere near what you see on the east coast - less institutional, at least in Northern California - this changes depending on how far inland you go. SoCal is considerably more tribal, and the LAPD has a bad history when it comes to race relations, but still not on the same level as WV.

Source: multiracial family, lived all over

Dunno… doodles are too clean. Napkin is suspiciously clean as well = no coffee stains, no wrinkles, no bad poetry. Looks like AI to me, or at least Photoshop.

This is almost exactly what happened to me on Monday, resulting in a fifteen hour day.

My particular jenga piece was an Access query that none of my predecessors had deigned to document or even tell me about… but was critical to run monthly or you had obsolete data embedded deep within multi-million dollar reports.

Thank god I don’t work on salary anymore, or I’d be really upset.