Donald Trump, 79

Don’t get my hopes up like that.

Buzzed enough to fight back

Nah she’s got 8 left

Time for a live action Disney remake of Charlotte’s origin story and inner darkness, starring Florence Pugh.

So the same way people make millions without superpowers.

You’re missing the stage between denial and anger, which is annual sick week, because I refuse to put on a sweater and then I shiver in the park for an entire Saturday and catch a cold.

Only if it’s blueberry pancakes.

I know a guy who takes them home and keeps them as pets for a few a weeks and then sets them loose back in the park.

I’ve heard good things about water picks.

That might be unisex.

Are you hiring? I’ve been known to chew a mean shower curtain and even the occasional sofa. And I can hit a mouse with a tampon from the other side of the kitchen.

Why are you so hung up on big age gaps? Just put everyone within a few years of each other.

Selena Gomez is in the cookie, how much clearer could they be?

I like her “written by a human” badge. Never saw one before. Gotta say I was wondering, which probably lends to her point.

Mrs. Tabitha Twitchit from The Tale of Samuel Whiskers by Beatrix Potter, in case it saves someone else a reverse image search.

I love that it shows you the stack trace.

Nice job, quality pun work

If she’s worried she might have it set to wake her up if he texts.

My mistake if that’s the case.

It sounds like the author of the article is more concerned with the incentive it creates for developers to push useless or sloppy updates (“impact driven development”) than the UX.