TL;DR
Two footballers went to a jewellers in Rome. They came in with their faces masked and shouted “Hands in the air! This is a stick up!”.
The jeweller shot one of them with a shotgun, who died minutes later. His last words were “It was just a joke…”
He left a wife and 2 kids.
Ew! Hubert Cumberdale, you taste like soot and poo!