I have an idea for a post, some may have seen a comment of mine earlier. I’m looking for the most offensive-to-coffee-snobs approach to making coffee possible. I’m assuming something to do with instant, but from there, I don’t have many ideas.
Someone suggested reconstituting it in milk, that seems fun, any other ideas? I’m fully expecting the end result to be absolutely disgusting, for what it’s worth. I’m looking for the worst abomination possible, but it still needs to technically be coffee. Get creative, have fun with this. Whichever technique gets chosen (or multiple get combined), I’ll credit in the post I make.
Laziest? Sure, but it’s not creative.
I take a mug, put the preground coffee in it, pour boiling water on it, stir it so the grounds mostly settle to the bottom, let it cool for a bit and drink. Quite common where I come from. I make it pretty strong too. People accuse me of drinking asphalt, but I enjoy it a bit more than most of those cheap automatic espresso machines.
You’ll get a bit in your teeth, that’s there for extra flavour and kick.
I mean, add some spoons and do a few at a time and you’ve got yourself a cupping.
Heh, never been enough a snob, had to Google that. You’re right! Turns out the simplest way to make coffee is also the best way to taste the specific properties of the beans apparently.
I do it with cheap preground though. Paulig, Merrild, whatever is on sale.
Well if you ever meet a really annoying coffee snob and you don’t want to feel embarrassed, when they ask you for your preferred brewing style you can always say you like a cupping as it allows you to taste the volatile aromatics more finely or some shit and hopefully impress them enough that they’ll leave you alone.
Oh no, if I meet a really annoying coffee snob, I’ll tell them I’ve moved on to adult drinks and only drink energy drinks now.
Partially true (minus the adult drink part), I drank more coffee as a teenager than I do now, energy drinks are convenient and I like a cold beverage, constantly making tons of ice coffee sounds exhausting.
Fair enough. I’ve never had an energy drink before and at this point I don’t want to try. Coffee works well for me and I don’t need all that sugar (or artificial sweetener). I have a rule that I don’t drink any sugar/sweetener. I’m not great at following it but I try my best. Trying an energy drink would probably make that rule a lot harder to follow.
My biggest weakness is juice honestly (and occasionally a latte). I’ve completely given up pop except on very rare occasions (like, probably 2-3 times per year I’ll have a root beer). I think I’ve cut everything else too. I pretty much just drink black coffee and water now. Occasionally wine/beer/whiskey but that’s getting rarer these days. When juice goes on sale though I find it very hard not to buy. If my wife is with me she’ll talk me out of it but if I’m solo I have terrible self control around juice, I’m like a toddler.