I got it from eBay and I am working on a refund/return. Hopefully it works out.

Would have been funnier if the dragon burned himself

Tell the pilot to cross into another time zone so you have an extra hour. Just make sure they don’t go the wrong direction.

I’ma be stealing Sassy Saturnalia if you don’t mind

And according to the snopes article someone else linked, their second mistake was being black

From what I understand, at least in some countries, you can still be charged for any minor crimes you commit along the way, such as if you take prison clothes with you or damage something on your way out.